See, I was inspired by a blog of a REAL writers who wrote stories from shopping lists (or perhaps that is just what they called their collection of words).
Well I’m not a REAL writer (in my mind at least, and that’s the only place that matters, right?) so I didn’t think I could construct a story from a random list of things…oh, and my shopping lists aren’t that long. I’m not that organized.
So I had a good friend write me a list. Now had I known she was just gonna jot down the things around her desk I might have asked someone else. But I’ve got deadlines see, so gotta get out the blog, see.
Here we go, some random true things.
I suffer from cenosillicaphobia. Go ahead, look it up. I had to.
What? if you know you suffer from it, why did YOU have to look it up? (that was me speaking for you. I’ll do that from time to time. Kind of annoying, huh?).
But I do…only when I’m hosting a party and its a little flat. Fill up them wine or beer glasses I say. OH, and especially when its my glass/bottle of beer. Keep ‘em coming, bartender.
Oh and in the spirit of randomness, why can’t I eat mexican food without wanting a beer?
M: thought I couldn’t use that one, huh? HA!
Hubs, Madpie and I live in a lovely old house and you know what that means don’t ya: a really COLD bathroom. So we use a space heater. Turn that little ol room into a sauna every morning. Oh, and the boss at work doesn’t like to use the central heat there so I’ve got one at my desk too.
Any of you fans of the persimmon? My friend M is. I was….until I bit into one I assume was past its prime. Like eating chalk. Ack.
My favorite Jennifer Aniston movie is Office Space. Nah, I’m not really a movie fan of hers. Love her in Friends and still get my fill each week, thank you. But you know the most awesome part of that movie? The Stephen Root character and his fixation with his Swingline stapler. And his missing getting a piece of cake. Poor Milton. Gonna have to netflix that one again soon.
Ooooh ooh ooh, the best neighbor in the world came by and saved me with the most delicious cookies. Can’t shovel these yummies into the pie hole fast enough! Might have to bust out the vacuum to clean up this mess: think Cookie Monster.
Ugh, I’m sitting here, striking the keys and plugging away but not exactly getting through the darn list. Could you just shove an umbrella in my ear and open it. It might be less painful. Who the hell uses the word “bollard” anyway? Other than architects, OBVS!
Christmas is right around the corner (thought I’d bring that to the attention of the oblivious ones out there). We always go home to the in-laws and it’s absolutely wonderful. No trees to take down after the festivities, no meal planning and no agendas. Downside? Yes, slick stairs for the sock wearing toddler (I’m a nervous wreck just thinking about it) and clocks.
Yeah, clocks. Cuckoo clocks, grandmother clocks, grandfather clocks. CLOCKS! Chiming away, tick tocking all day and all night.
Okay, personally I love them but it does take a few days to get used to them.
Aah, Christmas. You know if I could brag for a moment, one of the best gifts I ever gave was a tape measure. Yes, I said tape measure. Maybe I should mention it was Coach, and red…and given to a favorite woman in my life who actually uses it all the time.
Hey, I didn’t make this list of words, I’m just saying.
Of course, when I think of Christmas, I think of family. Who doesn’t, duh.
Where was I? Oh yeah. So my favorite brother, big scary bully that he was…yeah I’ve got favorites, so shoot me, played some interesting games when he was a kid. I don’t know why we had darts around the house since I don’t remember us owning a dartboard. He would play this game with his friend Rex where they would throw darts at each other’s feet. Maybe it was some form of horseshoes. Anyway one time Rex landed one of these delightful bar room accoutrements in my brother’s leg. Never saw Rex run so fast! And I’m not sure who won.
Anyone who can guess the whole 13 words I’ll buy you a beer, beaujolais or beverage of your choice, if you’re ever in the bay area. Yeah, I like aliteration, so shoot me.
i LOVE your blog! i'm so glad i finally got a chance to sit down and read several posts. i have been so out of touch in the blog world lately…it was a much needed hiatus from a lot of things.
you are going to be in dallas over christmas? that's fantastic! maybe we could meet up for coffee or tea or something just to say hello!
Never again refer to yourself as "not a real writer." If you do I will have to hunt you down and do you harm. This was a very clever, fun piece.
Okay, I'll play. See, I'm supposed to be writing a work project, and my brain is mush, so I figured a little dip into blog-land would be refreshing. So, with no confidence that this is correct: glass, space heater, persimmon, chalk, stapler, cookie crumbs, umbrella, keys, agenda/planner, clock, tape measure, coach bag, darts
Aaah, Blissed, so close. But it would be any fun if I end the game now, would it?
For the record you did get 7…maybe a half.
But I'll still treat you, if you and the husband make it to CA!
No, you need to keep it going…. Only 7; it's harder that I thought. Now I'm waiting to see whether the ones I THINK I got are actually right.