Friday flip off

Hi all.

Is your head still spinning from all the links from yesterday?  Are you going to come over here and kick me if I told you I haven’t finished rereading them?  Yeah, I have some homework to do this weekend.  FLIP OFF!

So if you haven’t already, make your way over to Momma Kiss’ house for some more, get if off you chest, bitch your heart out and start your weekend off right.

Where to start?

Flip off all you cute mommy bloggers!  I see what you’re doing.  All your cute and sweet and heart rending stories, pictures, advice, sucking me in, making me baby hungry.

Flip off job.

Okay, I love my job, I’m just trying to play the game you know.

Fuck off having too many things in my brain to let me sleep.  And flip off  Fall TV.  I love you and now that you’re back, you’ve taken over my life.

Flip off my own inability to work out on my own.  That was just nicer than telling my workout buddy to flip off for not being available to me more.  You know I don’t like to step on toes.

A big FUCK YOU to cancer.  You an asshole.  You’ve taken my best friend and now you’ve hurt someone close to my heart.  I’m coming after you!  Now the rest of you, go grab your boobs and have somebody look at ya naked.  You know what I mean.

Finally FUCK YOU body.  I take care of you, I feed you, I take you out for walks, I bathe your stinking ass regularly.  What do you give me in return?  This thing that makes having babies THE HARDEST FUCKING THING IN THE WORLD!  To add to the insult, I’m old enough to be needing a fertility clinic.  What the fuck in up with this zit on my forehead?  That’s just wrong.  I may just have to find some hot shirtless stallion of a man to pummel the hell out of you.  And then rub you down from head to toes with his large warm well greased hands.

Well that just got awkward.

Get your bitch on and start your weekend off right.  Go see Momma!

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