The return of Homer and Marge

My good friend from across the pond, George, is back with another tale of the incredibly hot and romantic couple Homer and Marge.  Please enjoy.

Homer And Marge:

The door slammed.

“Bastard!”

Feet stamped upstairs and wood was put under immense strain as a bedroom door was almost wrenched from it’s hinges.

“Bastard!”

More stamping feet on the stairs made their way back to the hallway.

“Bastard!”

“Is that you? D’ya get the Bud?”.  Homer twitched at the thought of a beer, but kept his eyes on the game.

“Bastard!” said Marge once more for effect as she entered the lounge. “I could kill you, Homer. I really could”.

In her hand was a box of condoms. She took one out then threw the box at Homer.

“What’ve I been’n done now?”

“I’m pregnant you idiot!” she growled as she peeled the wrapper off the condom.

“Congratulations Us!” said Homer.  ”Woooo-Woooo!  I think.”

Marge placed the tip of the condom over two fingers and rolled it down.  It split almost immediately.

“Look!” she spat at Homer holding her hand up and waving it in his face.

“Funny!  That’s what happens when I use ‘em too.”, came Homers reply as he watched his team fumble yet again.

“You … you … Oooooooooooooo!  I could strangle you!”, cried Marge.  ”Did ya read the box? Huh?  Did ya? ‘Made in 1959′ it says!  Jeez! We already have four kids!  What are we gonna do with a fifth?  How’re we gonna manage?”

“S’pose we could sneak it in without being noticed if we tried”

“I meant financially, smart ass!”

“I reckon I could get my boss to print my pay cheque on a piece’o rubber … make it stretch, y’know? Hahahahahahaha!”

The lounge door slammed behind a fuming Marge.  She once again stamped her way up the stairs and stormed into the bedroom. The windows rattled as that door too was slammed shut.  In the following silence, there was an audible ‘click’ as the key turned in the lock.

Homer, still in front of the TV, looked up at the ceiling and shouted “Are we still on for the Cop and Hooker game tonight Marge? Marge?”

8 Responses to The return of Homer and Marge
  1. Jax
    February 7, 2011 | 8:32 pm

    Oh how I love Homer and Marge! You are just too funny and somehow manage to stick a sexual entity in there somehow. Brilliant!
    Jax recently posted..The Truth and Inspiration – Top 10 of 2010

  2. Coffeypot
    February 7, 2011 | 8:39 pm

    We never use condoms, but she’s safe. I fake my orgasms.
    Coffeypot recently posted..Home Is The Sailor- Home From The Sea

  3. Jessica D Torres
    February 7, 2011 | 9:52 pm

    Hilarious! Poor Marge. The part about the rubber paycheck and making it stretch and the condoms from 1959…so funny!
    Jessica D Torres recently posted..Spare Time

  4. Ella
    February 8, 2011 | 6:54 am

    TOO funny!

    Definitely a fan of Homer and Marge.
    Ella recently posted..The Alienator and the Masochist

  5. MommaKiss
    February 8, 2011 | 7:39 am

    funny and sexay. Now that’s a goddamn combo.
    MommaKiss recently posted..Monday Funday

  6. Mrs.Mayhem
    February 8, 2011 | 11:14 am

    The cop and hooker game is a fun one.

  7. Joy
    February 9, 2011 | 2:17 am

    Poor Marge! Homer’s remark about the rubber check was funny.
    Joy recently posted..Smurfberries For Sale

  8. Blessing @ Working Mom Journal
    February 9, 2011 | 4:56 am

    The condom split? LMAO…this is hilarious!

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