Saying Goodbye

This was a post that I wrote a few of months ago and I’m still feeling a little raw over it all. But I’ve also hit a wall in the writing department so I’m digging through my drafts.  And before we get to the main event, could you ALL give Miss Jessica Torres and her most generous and talented husband some love for putting my little blog back together again, PLEASE!?!?! Thank you Assy!

Maddy has been in daycare since she was 3 months old. Our first sitter Rita,was truly unique. She was foreign born, outspoken and loved by all the children that were in her care. At her home, she had chickens and ducks, snakes, cats, a dog and whatever small rodent that needed a home. I have never known someone as colorful as Rita.

And while we loved Rita and regularly socialized withat her home for adult parties, she did have her drawbacks. She was closed A LOT! A total of three weeks in the spring, the entire month of July and another 4 weeks in the fall and winter. She also had so many older kids that she couldn’t give my daughter the floor time she needed. Maddy spent much of her day in her car seat or on a lap. Yes, she was loved but she wasn’t challenged.

We moved Maddy to another home base sitter when she was 2 1/2. Lynn also had animals. Her home was on a huge lot that was mostly dedicated to fruit trees and vegetables. She provided meals and snacks and only had a few kids, all around Maddy’s age. This sitter was warm and affectionate and clearly loved what she did. But as Maddy got older, she got more aggressive, more obstinate. Lynn was no match for her.

In both of these situations, the shine wore off fast. We fell madly in love only to find our needs weren’t met. Yes, care was given but not the exceptional care we wanted for our daughter. Leaving was not hard.

But our experience with Sam’s sitter, Miss Eileen, has been very different. Eileen specializes in infants. She has the perfect environment for little ones, lots of toys and crawling space and a heart as big as a house. Sam has been with her since he was 7 weeks old.

She sent pictures. Everyday our phones would vibrate with incoming texts, little snippets of Sam’s day. We didn’t feel like we were missing his infancy.

She also gave great advice. She kept Sam on a schedule that we could easily implement at home. She clearly adored Sam. I was often the last mother to arrive and she always had him snuggling in her arms. It was quite evident that she was reluctant to hand him over. Adonis and regularly joked that we would come to pick him up and find that Eileen had left town with our son. And he loved her. The squeals of delight when I would hand him to her in the mornings were loud enough to clear the cobwebs that had grown in my head overnight.

But we’re moving. Moving too far away to continue to take Sam to Eileen.

I told her on Friday. She was clearly shaken, distraught, broken. We held each other and cried.

The tears will continue to come as I snuggle my son, as I scroll through the hundreds of pics on my phone, as I attempt to replace Sam’s second mother and my dear friend.